By Ashley Lodato
I hope everyone had a good holiday celebrating the kinship established in New England between the native residents of North America and struggling European refugees in the 17th century.
In the spirit of promoting gratitude during this holiday season, I will dedicate this week’s shout-out to the Canadian visitor who dropped in to donate blood at the last Red Cross blood drive at the Barn. This woman (whose name I neglected to note) was doing a road trip around Montana, Idaho and Washington, and during her two-day stay in Winthrop she noticed that a blood drive was in progress, walked in, and offered up her arm. Now there’s a gesture that’s in the right vein!
Fi, fie, fo, fum — it appears that an unregistered visitor has set up residence under the SaTeekWa Bridge. Somehow, despite the obstacles presented by the two locked gates between Mazama and Newhalem — which is known to harbor numerous nefarious characters — this alien was able to slip through the Cascade Crest border undetected. Were the Silver Star and Diablo gates not simply flimsy limbo sticks but instead something more formidable, like steel and razor wire, for example, this security breach surely would have been impossible.
I received an anonymous tip that this troll had moved in under the bridge and, as the only troll I was acquainted with at that point was the Fremont Troll, I hastened down to the north end of Winthrop to introduce myself. Once on the SaTeekWa Bridge, I spotted the troll immediately. He is neither a shapeshifter nor a humanoid like some of his halfling counterparts from around the world. No, this troll is clearly identifiable as one from the troll kingdom, once you get past the first impression, which is that he is sort of a Flat-Stanley-Meets-the-Wild-Things version of a troll. Also, he is only in possession of a torso, not stumpy troglodyte legs.
I’m not sure what the town residents plan to call this undocumented freeloader, but he seems to have moved in for good, so I suggest that someone figure out what his name is. I’m guessing that the kids around the neighborhood have some ideas already, so let’s float those names out there.
Bear in mind that this little hobgoblin might one day achieve notoriety beyond the scope of this gossip column. Many of you are aware that the Fremont Troll has appeared in at least two Hollywood films (10 Things I Hate About You and Love Happens) and it’s possible that our new mini-ogre has grandiose ambitions for himself on the silver screen, so please select appropriately noble or noteworthy names.
In the meantime, be careful as you go trip-trapping over that SaTeekWa Bridge.